Skip to content

5 Most Widespread Narcissist Hoovering Strategies

Hoovering Strategies

The narcissist’s hoovering strategies consist of often common attitudes that allow him to regain an ascendancy over his prey. But what exactly are they? Let’s find out how a Narcissus moves when he decides to come back.

Narcissist’s Hoovering Strategies: What are the most famous?

Mainly, the narcissist prefers the silent returns, especially when he knows perfectly well that the prey will fall back into his net without him making too much effort, to be sure he will send some signals first, These are also known as methods of narcissist returns. On the contrary, he will try to get more involved when the latter moves further and further away, until giving him the feeling of having forgotten him. So… what are the most used hoovering strategies?

1. Message on WhatsApp

Simple and painless, in this case Narcissus will be heard with ease, even if among you there were some fatal quarrels. You might get a text asking how you’re doing or going out. The return of the narcissist through WhatsApp is very common, even during the holiday or birthday period.

Besides, who doesn’t respond to a birthday message? A little out of politeness and a little out of curiosity, the victim falls into the trap and answers the text message. Here the narcissist will understand the concept that this is still subjugated by him and then, with a very silent step, will try to show up on a second occasion. Maybe push a little harder and ask for a date.

Obviously, it’s best not to answer him. Also, because it is just a way to confirm his power and not to make sure that the person in question really gets his “warm wishes”.

RELATED:  When Narcissist Stops Looking for You: A Stroke of Luck!

2. The random encounter, that’s not random!

It is likely that you know the most frequented places, where your home is or where you work. It may happen that you meet him by chance, just when you least expect it and usually, this attitude serves to bring back memories. Although he’s not empathetic at all, he’s a great observer, so it’s easy to tell by your expression whether you like to see him or not.

In addition, you are in a position to have to say goodbye and this is a nice strategy to start talking! Since for education, usually, you tend to speak to people with whom you would not want to have anything to do, just limit yourself to a “hello” and if he will try to chat, better to disappear with a “I’m busy” as soon as possible.

Surely it will not be an attitude of which he will be happy, but it is also true that those who are the cause of his evil cry himself, as they say.

3. Photos on the Social Networks

A self-respecting narcissist takes great care of his social media. You will happen to see him upload photos of his new flame and by the way, are in fashion stories, which if opened leave the notification. Fresh air for Narcissus! In fact, it will happen to see him in the company of his partner, in their fantastic idyllic relationship, with phrases taken from the best works of love in the captions!

This is a tactic to understand if any of his old flames decide to peek at his profile, maybe open a story or worse, taken by a raptus of jealousy write directly to him!

Let’s be more specific…

Consider the fact that now, being in the era of digital, upload some photos in the company of partners is usual. What instead becomes unusual is the fact of doing it in any kind of occasion, even in the most useless ones. An example would be showing a photo where her current partner has cooked something good for dinner or that they are eating a pizza and seeing Netflix. In this case, he’s sending strong signals to show that he’s finally found his soul mate. But obviously not, he’s trying to get someone’s attention.

RELATED:  Does the Narcissist Always Return? Everything Depends on the Victim!

Yeah, but who?

It’s not necessarily that of a particular person, maybe they are more prey. The narcissist triangulates often, so he could use this technique to “drop more fish into the same net” or he’s really targeting someone in particular.

There is no way to figure out who those references are for, of course it is that if he shares a place where you used to go and brings us a new person, then most likely it is from you that he wants to receive attention. On the contrary, it can also showcase places and situations where you have never been to show that with the new flame is going there. But it might not even do any of that, I mean, there’s no one-size-fits-all answer.

These situations need to be analysed on a case-by-case basis and it is not easy to draw conclusions. What’s certain is that he’s flaunting something to get someone’s attention. Of course, it is best not to give him satisfaction and let him cook in his broth. If you’re just dying to see what it does, rather than leaving notifications, get one of those apps that allow you to see them without a trace.

4. Meeting Friends in Common

Similar to point two, but much more difficult to manage. In this case, the narcissist returns trying to invite himself or be invited to any kind of meeting or event where he is sure he will meet you. In these situations, he will try to have a chat, to understand how you behave in his presence or even begin to brag about himself to see how you react.

RELATED:  Does the Narcissist Always Return? Everything Depends on the Victim!

And how do you react in these situations?

He’s playing it cool! Talk to him as if he were someone you didn’t have any kind of history with, don’t get caught up in jealousy, don’t ignore him, but don’t give him the importance you want to give him. Chat like you would with any person who’s telling you about themselves and you’ll never see them again. It must be a completely natural attitude, without forcing!

5. Self-pity is another narcissist’s hoovering strategy

This is the last resort. Here it will rain excuses of various kinds, prayers to be forgiven or any other attitude to make you feel sorry and forgive him. He often alternates moments of self-pity with others in which he behaves in a light way to try to dampen a little the spirits.

It is obvious to say that the wolf loses the fur but not the vice, and that he will never change his attitude. It’ll just be a way to hang up the reports and get back in control of you. Again, it is better to dismiss him with a simple “you had your chance and you wasted it”.

Narcissist’s Hoovering Strategies: Not Always Easy To Let Go

Unfortunately, moving on is never easy. In addition, the narcissist’s hoovering strategies often and willingly fit the person he wants to strike, so it is never so easy to send him away or not to be subjugated.

There is also to say, however, that the narcissist disappears when he sees that you are strong and tenacious in wanting to change life but obviously it is always the case that if you have the feeling of being maneuvered or deprived of the management of free will as you would like, then it is appropriate to ask for help from a psychologist able to give targeted advice on a case-by-case basis.