How to deal with a narcissist if you don’t know when you’ll meet him? But more importantly, what’s the best way to deal with it on a case by case basis? In this article we have selected 7 different occasions where you might have to deal with them, to understand how to handle them.
1. How to Deal with a Covert Narcissist
The narcissist Covert is more difficult to notice the disorder of which he suffers. What mainly characterizes him is being a slightly more shy person but very attentive to details.
Their modus operandi consists in never telling too much about themselves, but at the same time trying to study the weak points of their new prey. Usually, in fact, a Covert narcissist in love is very romantic but only when the situation requires it. Often carefully calibrate which are the right care to give to the new flame but will open with her with the dropper.
Long periods will pass before you know your whole story and perhaps you will never know it all, it tends to hide any kind of information about yourself and to only bring out the relevant ones. Linked mainly to victimhood, to drive into the prey of guilt that keep her attached to him.
Being able to detach from a Covert narcissist is really very difficult and what is strictly recommended is to avoid giving him private information. That’s because in the long run he’d use them as weapons.
When you realize that you are completely subjugated by the Covert narcissist, you will want to try to get away, also because its tactics consist in continuous returns and distancing. Whenever he decides to come back, he will make him feel guilty about his victim.
Often, in case there are quarrels they may be related to something he did, such as a betrayal for example, but also to something that did the prey and that bothered him, even just telling him the truth in the face could unleash his anger. As a result, there will be quarrels that will end with extremes on the part of Narcissus.
In case he cheated, he’ll try to make his partner feel guilty about feeling lonely, calculating or something, what matters is that he’ll never take responsibility. It goes without saying that the blame will be passed on to the partner in case he has only warned that his attitudes are harmful.
2. How to Deal with an Overt Narcissist
Unlike Covert, the Overt narcissist in love behaves in a completely opposite manner. That is, he prefers to give his partner extra attention, he will still remain a great strategist but manages to make the prey in question feel unique. This one will feel more desired than ever, especially by someone with an enormous charm.
This kind of feeling is able to bring very strong emotions, on the other hand it is not often to see Prince Charming arrive at the white horse or drop a heartbreaker at their feet. In fact, that’s not really the case. What seems like the moment of an idyllic love is the common love bombing phase.
Here, you will feel really good, the effect received is equal to Nirvana! It is a pity that it really takes too little time to consider a proper relationship, in fact they will be devalued and discarded. When the narcissist slowly disappears, unlike the Covert, which tends to leave trying to leave a window for a possible return, the Overt aims to disappear without a trace.
Does that mean he’s not coming back?
Of course he will! His technique is to make his victim feel confused, he wants her to want him in every way, but he’ll get bored knowing that she might take him for granted, and so, you just won’t hear him and you won’t see him for a long time. He won’t return your calls and messages, and he’ll only return when he has the doubt that you’re no longer dependent on him.
Then he’ll want to try and get you back into his net. Knowing the mechanisms of fishing is useful to get away from this kind of relationships and start again, away from him!
3. How to Deal with an Malignant Narcissist?
The malignant narcissist falls into that category of people that it is always good to recognize in time before ending up in a mental maze from which it becomes very complex to get out! A person with this type of personality is decidedly restless, in some cases aggressive and often with attacks of sadism.
It’s hard to recognize him at first and often. There are some tips that can be useful to you, for example in the article on the narcissist’s body language we tried to give some clarification on this. But nevertheless, you have to keep your attention high to really understand who you are, especially before you fall into your net.
In fact, he’s certainly not the kind of guy you want to spend your entire life, especially when you know his dark side. It’s capable of dumping a person to the point of losing their impulses to be able to react to a given situation.
The wisest way to manage the situation is to try to get away as soon as you have the doubt that this person is implementing manipulative techniques to benefit himself, and if he is shown anger and unjustified anger, you must necessarily let go.
It might be easier said than done, so in all those cases where it becomes difficult to leave, you need to ask someone for help. Even a friend could make a difference to take a step further, but surely the help of a psychologist becomes essential!
4. How to Deal with a Manipulative Narcissist?
As you can see, the personality of the narcissist and the manipulator are very similar. Basically, a simple manipulator does his best to get what he wants, but he doesn’t do it in a schematic way like a narcissist.
A manipulative narcissist is simply a narcissist (overt or covert) who wants at all costs to get from his prey of nourishment, to feel wanted and invigorate his ego. The reason this happens is related to the simple fact that he is suffering from low self-esteem at very high levels.
To compensate for this lack, he will seek in any way someone from whom he will receive it. It is also worth remembering that the world is not full of pathological narcissists, but simply of people who possess only some traits of narcissism. So, it’s easy to see that some relationships go through the wrong process because partners don’t realize the shortcomings in the other, taking for granted a myriad of factors that might be relevant.
The correct way to behave is to remember that we all have value and as such we must ensure that this is respected by others. This means moving away from those who do not want to make us suffer.
5. How to Deal with an Ex Narcissist?
Often you hear the phone ringing and see a notification of your former narcissist. At the beginning, the feeling is similar to a liberation, in the sense that you waited so long to see him return that you remain almost incredulous to see that he once again knocked on the door to understand if there is still a place for him!
Here you have to be very careful, an ex narcissist still remains a narcissist! This means that his return is dictated by the fact that he wants to understand if he still has the power and the possibility of subjugating you. The most interesting part is that he will return tiptoe, quietly and after carefully studying his moves.
Narcissus never does anything by accident. So, in case he comes back, you have to say no! The ideal would be not even to answer the message and pretend that nothing ever happened.
But there is more…
An ex always knows how to take his old love, so it might also tickle your attention not through a message, but maybe through social media or rumors that would lead you to bring questions. Questions only he can answer and for which you will have to look for him. Don’t fall into his trap, let it go and go your own way.
Remember that he could never be changed, because to change he would have to follow a therapeutic path. If this has not taken place, then there is no reason to embark on something that you have already experienced and that has not borne good fruit.
6. What to do with a narcissistic partner?
Living a relationship with a narcissistic partner is never easy. It often happens that Narcissus decides to settle down and live a life with some fixed points that, however, are not necessarily a symptom of true love. Often and willingly, if a narcissist decides to find a partner, he does so to show the world that he too can have a “normal” relationship like everyone else.
It is a pity, however, that such relations are often counter-productive and intrinsic to betrayals or lies. Unfortunately, when you realize that you are engaged to a Narcissus it also becomes very difficult to wriggle and get rid of it. The form of manipulation that is carried out is often intense and it would be foolish to think of a future together with someone who is willing or unwilling to give love and well-being to their partner.
The ideal would be to convince the partner to put a hand on his conscience and start a path that will help both. Often, however, it is difficult to make him realize how his attitude is harmful for the couple, reaching the point of being answered with a dry no.
You cannot try to help those who do not want to be helped, but you can help themselves, so if the partner refuses any form of help then you will have to look for an alternative solution to get out of it yourself. A victim who moves away from a narcissist is a very common situation and even if it is very difficult with commitment and dedication you can reach the desired result.
7. What if he’s a narcissistic husband?
Like the narcissist partner, there is also the narcissist husband. Similar to the partner but with the sacred bond of marriage in the middle everything becomes more complicated.
A narcissistic husband usually tends to block the healthy development of the relationship, trying in every way to question all the goodwill of a wife who just wants to have a stable and peaceful marriage. Sometimes it is hoped that such a relationship will be somewhat tedious, to appreciate the routine which is only harmful in large quantities.
Marrying a narcissistic man is like living a life in the middle of a storm. There will always be something that doesn’t work and you will always feel wrong. You will also often have the feeling of being replaced with other partners and many times these are not just feelings, but real attacks of intuition.
The reasoning is always the same, if something hurts you have to let him go. Of course, in a marriage it is not possible to give up everything and leave, but it is possible to be strong and start a rehabilitation path. If you are lucky enough not to have a pathological narcissist next to you, but a simple person with more or less accentuated traits, maybe you will also be able to follow a couple therapy. In extreme cases, however, it is better to follow a solitary therapy to regain that hope of regaining your freedom that you think you have lost. Unfortunately there are not many ways to answer the question of how to behave with a narcissist, often and willingly it is better to find a solution to try to recreate a constructive life full of beautiful emotions rather than succumb!